


boys in the street

by dreamsofash



Series: song drabbles - moreid [1]
Category: Criminal Minds (US TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Derek-centric, Fluff, Gay Male Character, Homophobia, Internalized Homophobia, LGBTQ Themes, LMAO, M/M, Minor Character Death, Moreid, Songfic, it was supposed to be a drabble, question mark
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-18
Updated: 2019-10-18
Packaged: 2020-12-22 22:08:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,034
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21083855
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dreamsofash/pseuds/dreamsofash
Summary: Derek Morgan knew what it was like to afraid of your own mind. Not many people might’ve thought that...Alternate Universe where Derek’s dad didn’t die when he was younger, and moreid becomes a thing :)





	boys in the street

**Author's Note:**

> Warning for homophobia! 
> 
> Also, I based this off of the song ‘Boys In The Street’ by A Great Big World. I don’t own the song or Criminal Minds, but goddamn MoReid sure does own my heart. Thanks for reading and enjoy :)
> 
> TH/TP

_You’re a part of this family_  
_I made you myself _  
_And the way that you’re acting isn’t good for your health, my son _  
_Stop kissing boys in the street_  
_My son,_  
_Stop kissing boys in the street_

  
Derek knew what it was like to be afraid of your own mind. Not many people might’ve thought that, and that’s because he had learned to accept what scared him about his mind. He grew more comfortable with it. The fear started when he was fifteen years old. His father, Hank, had always told him that love was a special thing between a man and a woman, and the reason they fell in love was to have children. Then their children would grow up and spread the same thought, and it would be a whole new, beautiful cycle.  
But Derek was confused. When he had his first kiss at fourteen, with a girl at homecoming, he hadn’t felt anything. He hadn’t even felt anything when they were holding hands. He wondered if he was too young to “fall in love,” that he just wasn’t ready for a relationship.  
And then there was Harry.  
Harry had been Derek’s childhood friend since kindergarten. They did everything together: play with action figures, go to the movies, even asked their dates to homecoming together.  
On the night of homecoming, after Derek had parted with his date, he found himself side by side with Harry on the bleachers of the football field. They were eating popsicles and just admiring the view of the football field with the lights blasting down on the grass.  
And well, that was the night Harry kissed him. The first time Derek kissed a boy. And… he felt something. That feeling he assumed was love… and a bit of confusion. His dad never mentioned anything about love between two men. Sure, Derek knew about gay and bi and… well, all LGBT people, but he just never thought it would apply to him. But it made sense. And he was happy to have found out what made him feel something he assumed he was supposed to feel for a girl.  
What he hadn’t noticed was Harry’s dad, waiting to pick his son up. He realized that Harry was late and went looking for him, and eventually found himself at the football field. Upon looking around, he noticed two figures leaned close on the bleachers. When he moved towards them, he realized that it was Harry and Derek, sucking face.  
That was when Harry got called away. Derek had to walk home in the dark. But the buzzing feeling in his chest lead him home and out of harm’s way…

The next morning, when Derek rolled out of bed and went into the kitchen, he was greeted by an unsettling silence. His father was sitting at the end of the table, glancing at the newspaper in his hands. Of course, Derek had no idea why this tense atmosphere had suddenly appeared between them.  
“I heard you hung out with Harry for a little bit after the dance last night,” Hank said finally.  
Derek’s heart thudded in his chest. Why? “Y-yeah, we sat on the bleachers by the football field and ate popsicles.”  
Hank didn’t say anything, just laughed a bit and shook his head. “Son, I need you to tell me the truth…”  
The younger boy looked down at his feet and back up to his father with a confused look on his face. “About what?” he asked, his voice a whisper.  
The newspaper was folded and dropped. Glasses were slid up to perch on his dad’s forehead. “Did you kiss Harry? Or was that just some shit his dad mistook?”  
Derek didn’t know what to say. His dad’s tone was unreadable. Was he homophobic and therefore disappointed? Was he upset since Derek was young? He had never expressed his feelings about homosexuality, so Derek had no idea.  
“Uh- Um…”  
Again, there was that laugh accompanied by a headshake. “Dammit, Derek…” Hank whispered.  
That was when Derek realized his father’s view on gay people. He was rubbing his temples like he was stressed out. “How the _hell_ am I supposed to respond when someone tells me _my son_ was kissing another boy?”  
Derek’s lower lip trembled. “I-“  
“Derek, you _can’t_ love another boy. It’s- it’s disgusting, it’s _unnatural_. God, now you’ll never amount to what I hoped you’d be… my _only_ son. You’re the last thing I needed.”  
“Dad-“  
“We’ll talk later, Derek… I- I’ve got to figure some things out.”  
And Hank just walked out of the room, leaving Derek staring at the wall with watery eyes and shaking shoulders. Little did he know, things would only get worse from there. He would decide not to tell his mother or his sisters. Harry would move away. And when Derek turned 18, he was preparing to go off to college. One of his sisters, at the same time, was succeeding immensely in her school’s volleyball team. The coach was willing to offer her a scholarship for her senior year, even though she was still only a junior. Derek’s father was flattered and endlessly congratulated his sister, hugging her with extreme fatherly love. And as for Derek… he got a hug when he finished graduating, but he didn’t feel the same way his sister seemed to feel when she got hugged. It wasn’t an outpouring of fatherly love, no. More like… hey, good job buddy.  
Derek knew why, of course. The rest of his family didn’t.  
After the ceremony, Hank pulled him aside. “You’re still not… having those _urges_, are you?”  
Derek bit the inside of his cheek, not able to say anything. A flashback of Carl Buford, of the blowjob he had just given a fellow student before the ceremony, how dirty he felt-  
He hadn’t even noticed that his dad had started going off.  
“-and we’re paying for you to go to college! You still act this way, like it’s a part of you. It’s _not_, Derek, you can change- you _have_ to. It’s not good for you. For anyone. Imagine how your mother would react if she knew? You-“  
Derek couldn’t listen anymore. He was angry, heartbroken, frustrated… with his dad and with himself. Why couldn’t he just live up to Hank’s expectations? Why did he have to be gay? Why couldn’t he just be like most of the other boys at his school, just get a girlfriend and have sex and get married and have a family? _How could he do this to his family? _  
  
-

Years and years later, Derek met Doctor Spencer Reid at the BAU in the FBI.

Just a few months after working with Doctor Reid, he’d realize that he was in love with the man.

After months of pining, his feelings would finally overflow. And he was so fucking grateful that his pretty boy felt the same way.

The first few months weren’t easy. Derek had an internal struggle, sometimes breaking down. Sometimes it felt like not even Spencer could lift his marred heart out of the darkness. But he always did, because he proved to Derek that it was okay to love other men. It wasn’t a choice: it wasn’t making Derek anything less in his eyes. Spencer loved him. And Derek felt like he belonged.

Spencer was _beautiful_. Every shy smile, every glance with his big, doe-like eyes, everytime he tucked his long hair behind his ear. Derek finally felt comfortable with his mind.

-

Two years after they started dating, Derek and Spencer were living together in an apartment, working at the BAU as the iconic couple. They helped each other through every hardship they experienced due to this job. It was one of their few days off; the two were cuddled together on the couch, a show quietly playing in the background. Derek was lying back on the arm of the couch, and Spencer was sprawled out over the older man, his head resting on Derek’s chest just so he could listen to his heartbeat. Derek absentmindedly stroked his pretty boy’s hair, allowing his eyes to slip shut for a moment.  
That was when Derek’s phone went off. He shifted to try and get up to grab it, but Spencer grumbled and shoved his face deeper in an attempt to keep Derek down. He laughed, ruffled Spencer's hair, and finally slid out from underneath him. He padded across the room to his phone, picking it up and putting it to his ear.  
“This is Morgan,” he said.  
“_Derek_,” a voice said. His mom.  
“Mama…” Derek whispered. “It’s been awhile. What’s going on?”  
Spencer came up behind Derek and wrapped his arms around his torso, nuzzling his nose into Derek’s neck.  
“_It’s your father,_” his mother said. “_He- he had a heart attack, baby, he’s dying…_”  
Pause.  
“_Derek_?”  
“I’m here mama,” he said finally. “I’ll fly home as soon as I can.”  
“_Stay safe sweetheart._”  
He hung up and turned in Spencer’s grip, pressing a kiss to the top of his head.  
“What’s going on?” Spencer asked, looking into Derek’s eyes.  
Derek chewed his lower lip. “My pops… my mom says he’s dying…”  
“Are you… gonna go?”  
Sighing, Derek rested his cheek on Spencer’s shoulder and gently swayed back and forth. Spencer closed his eyes and let the feeling envelope the two of them.  
“Probably,” Derek answered finally.  
“Do you want me to come with you?”  
“Only if you want.”  
Spencer stilled and tightened his grip. “Okay.”

The flight seemed longer than it actually was. Derek couldn’t concentrate on anything, so he found himself just staring out the tiny window at the endless sky. Spencer was holding his hand, alternating from reading a book to watching Derek for a moment. When the plane finally landed, Spencer had to gently urge Derek off into the airport. They stopped to grab a bite to eat before catching a cab to the hospital. Derek was trembling the whole time, so Spencer made sure to grip his hand and help him through it. Until they got to the door. Derek stopped and slipped his hand out of Spencer’s grip. The younger man looked up at the older with questioning eyes.  
“I can do it,” Derek reassured.

And he went inside.

Hank was lying back in a hospital bed, eyes closed, chest rising and falling slowly with each heavy breath through his breathing tube. A heart rate monitor beeped quietly in the background. Derek could feel his hands sweating as he approached the bedside. His dad’s eyes flickered open.  
A small smile spread over his face, and it managed to be transferred to Derek’s as well.  
“Hey dad,” he said softly.  
“Derek..” Hank replied, his voice hoarse. “How- how are you?”  
Derek shrugged and sat in the chair by the bed. “Could be better, could be worse.”  
A silence fell between the two of them. Derek fiddled with his fingers and stared at his shoes. Suddenly, Hank cleared his throat.  
“Son…” he began, “I- I wanted to apologize.”  
“What do you mean?”  
“You know what I mean.”  
Derek bit his lip, not knowing what to say.  
Hank continued. “I’m sorry, Derek. There was no way for me to know, I was- I grew up being taught that men only love women, but… now I’m not so sure that’s true.” He smiled at his son, tearing up a bit. “My son.”  
Derek’s eyes welled up as well and he bit his lip. “Pa…”  
“Do you- are you seeing anyone?” he asked, and Derk could tell he was getting weaker. He nodded.  
“He um… he’s outside. Spencer.”  
“Can I meet him?”  
Derek nodded again and stood, bringing Spencer into the room.  
“Hello, Mister Morgan,” he said quietly. “It’s uh… nice to meet you.”  
Hank smiled at him. “A pleasure to meet you, Spencer. Make my son happy.” He turned to Derek. “Take care of him. Be yourself, Derek… I’m proud of you.”  
Derek’s eyes spilled over. Spencer took his hand in silence. The heart rate monitor fell into a flatline.  
“I love you, pops,” Derek sobbed. Spencer wrapped an arm around Derek and lead him out of the room.

_When I’m gone,  
Keep kissing boys in the street _

**Author's Note:**

> Comment your thoughts/some songs!!


End file.
